Today started off really well, with a large skinny latte and a To Do list that was totally manageable. Where did it all go wrong?! Work went crazy this afternoon and since then I have been in a right funk. Even paying off my loan this afternoon didn’t help and I have been looking forward to that for months!
Actually now I come to think of it, maybe that’s the problem. Do you know when you’re supposed to be over the moon about something but the euphoria never really hits? “Supposed to be” are the important words here. I’ve felt like that so many times in the past, and got into that nasty little thought cycle. You know the one: “I have a boyfriend, a house, family and friends. I’m supposed to be happy. Why aren’t I? There must be something wrong with me. I’m rubbish. I should be grateful for what I’ve got. Why am I so miserable? Why would anyone like such a miserable bitch?”
Good grief! I give myself such a hard time and why??? Because my brain chemicals are a little skew whiff?! So I’m taking the pressure off for tonight. Crappy tv and cups of tea all evening. Real “Me Time”. And I shall start afresh tomorrow.